Owie!

My drawing sucks, too, by the way…

Why won’t my right hand behave?

Challenges are fun!

Happy Birthday, blah blah blah…

“Accept the things we cannot change…”

I recently had 5 teeth extracted from the bottom… not MY bottom. I didn’t get bit by a shark or a dog or something… the bottom jaw. Lower teeth. That’s what I should have said. 5 lower teeth were extracted.

And a denture put in. That’s right. 5 days before my 41st birthday and I now have dentures on the top and bottom. Not full ones, but still!

In an effort to make the best of it, I twatted that I thought that my hobo costume at Hallowe’en (And yes, Grifter, I MIGHT come out this Hallowe’en…) was going to be AWESOME!

Which led to the creation of a character in my head.

It was originally going to be “El Hobo Lobo” but it was pointed out to me that “LOCO” is “Crazy”, and “Lobo” is “Wolf”…

So it got changed to “El Hobo Loco”.

Then my friend, Patrick, named me “Don Hobo Loco”…

The Don Ho reference actually cracked me up for about 10 minutes straight, so the “Loco” was dropped.

I hate to say it, but there’s a very good chance that I may either perform at some point as “Don Hobo”

(note to self: Make sure you can sing with your dentures out.
Note to self addendum: Oh, yeah… I can’t sing with them IN, so…)

or put out an album called “El Hobo Loco” (don’t want Don Ho after my ass… that dude could kick my butt easy!) of all bizarre ukulele covers of inappropriate songs. Or maybe just my favorite songs… I haven’t decided.

I was also considering creating a new style of music: Punk Ukulele… right up until the point where I realized that it would be called “Puke”.
So now I’ll just try some punk music ON the ukulele.

I did think about making/getting made a low slung, longer necked cigar box uke, to get into the punk spirit…

then I remembered…

I’VE ONLY BEEN PLAYING FOR A WEEK AND I SUCK AT IT!

I tend to get ahead of myself…

(On another note, not that anyone’s reading this babble, if you’re trying to get in touch with me… um… leave a message here. My email is acting wonky and I want to try to… well, I don’t want to go into it here… but, yeah… it’s wonky, so I’m not answering it until I fix it.)

Well that sucked…

It wasn’t as bad as I was expecting (read: dreading), but it still sucks ass.

Ah, well… another opportunity to practice being Zen.

Speaking of practicing, the Ukulele playing is coming along. I’m much better than I thought I’d be after only a week or so.

I can almost play a song!

Y’all, playin’ an instrument is HARD!

(Just a note, I have no idea why people think vampires are sexy. I’ve had blood in my mouth all day and my breath is decidedly UNSEXY at the moment. Think about what someone who actually DRINKS the stuff smells like!

I’m just sayin’…)

(Addendum: The last parenthetical was NOT a tie-in to the title. Pure coincidence. I WISH I was that clever at 5am…)

Bummed…

Team Coco!

And a video!

That frigging cat!

So, it’s “neutered”, spaying is for the ladies.

Just for clarification, as I don’t want to defame his character, there are no pink crayons showing up when he goes at it… he just makes biscuits with his back feet, for long minutes at a time, biting on whatever comes to hand… or mouth… with a look that the final panel sums up on his face.

He’s a filthy beast.

So awesome!

Wanna see something messed up?

I’m jus’ sayin’.

Shouldn’t I… or SOMEONE!… have got paid for that?

I have assumed for years that Popa Chubby got paid by True Religion for the art, as it was given to him.

Just heard from the lovely Galea, his bride. “Hope it made your wallet fat…”

Fuckers stole my shit!

And there’s sweet fuck all I can do about it, really…

How do you prove it?

Unless Popa Chubby still has the image on his site and has timestamps…

Lord… I hate this lawyer shit

And is it really worth it? How much could I get?

Edited to add…

Seriously… could I get something for this? I just looked at their site and the company was only founded in 2002!

Or is the piece changed enough that it’s fair use?

Guys, what’s the what? I need help on this, ‘cuz it’s starting to get to me how wrong this is.

Look at this! MILLIONS of dollars! That shit ain’t right.

When you do that voodoo that you do so well…

So, I’m having a conversation today about how outraged I am that Pat Robertson could say something like he did and not get struck down by the very God he professes to talk to, and was brought face to face with a scary fact of life that, while I was aware of it, the severity of the problem hadn’t struck home…

People are stupid.

Not persons. Not individuals.

People.

I was informed over the course of the conversation that, and I quote, “Something like 90% of them are voodoo.”
Where was this “fact” coming from? “Someone on the radio said it.”

To make matters worse, THAT source was more valid, in their minds, than a Wikipedia article backing up what _I_ was saying, stating that 80% of the population is Catholic. I actually had it at far less than 80%. “Oh, ANYONE can write on Wikipedia. Who’s to say that that’s correct?”

First off, the MILLIONS of people that edit Wikipedia, checking for misinformation.
Secondly, notice how they didn’t defend THEIR source, just attacked mine.
I couldn’t be assed, at this point, to look into other sources, as I was on the Blackberry.

Here’s the kicker, though.

Haitian “voodoo” is based on West African religions, from peoples like the Yoruba. It was then mixed with Catholicism, much like Catholicism is a mixture of a bunch of different belief systems.

Disregarding the fact that some of these very same people who are pointedly NOT saying “This is God’s wrath for ‘being voodoo’” outright would, when shown a Yoruba mask in my gallery, fall in love with the “Africanness” of it and proclaim THAT belief system as valid and, oh, I don’t know… real. Heritage. Blah blah blah.

Taking THAT out of the mix, here’s what kills me.

Because they mixed with Catholicism, Voodoo’s big God, the creator, Bondyè?

IS THE ABRAHAMIC GOD!

It’s the same guy!

The Father. Jehovah. Yahweh. G-D. The Big Guy. The Man Upstairs.

All the same guy.

Oy.

(On, and on a side note: Yes, I am aware that Papa Legba is the “Head Honcho” in Voodoo and I drew Baron Samedi, who isn’t. The gag worked better with the more familiar character. Papa Legba is an old dude with a pipe and a crutch.)

(Oh, and any similarities between the Pope and either Gollum or The Emperor are purely intentional.)